Looks like I’m moving again. Not too far this time; only from Los Angeles to Long Beach. Thinking about relocating (again), I started to feel a little overwhelmed. Then I laughed when I thought back to when I moved to Paris – I went back to school as an adult to finish my undergraduate degree in a city where I did not know anybody and where I did not speak the language.

Heck, bring on Long Beach! Relocating can be just as scary as it is exciting. Here are some tips I’ve picked up along the way.

I moved to Paris six years ago, but it feels like yesterday. I was excited, yet anxious and nervous to make the move. I thought I was prepared; I learned some basic French, reached out to a couple friends of friends who lived in Paris…. Boy was I in for a surprise.

I loved Paris as a tourist, but when I first moved there, I soon learned to hate it. Homework, writing papers, living on a student budget, struggling with everyday tasks such as grocery shopping and banking, or even just having a conversation!

What had I gotten myself into?! I was miserable for the first nine months. Don’t get me wrong, there were a lot of great, unforgettable moments in those first nine months, but it took nine months for me to really feel like Paris was becoming my new home.

I went from despair to arguably the happiest time in my life.

How I felt connected again:

• I reached out to everybody and accepted every invitation. I was extremely nervous and awkward, AND I needed a social life! I went to a party alone one of my first few weeks in Paris, terrified that I would walk in and not be able to understand one word. I was greeted by a kind (and quite attractive) Frenchman who spoke English fluently. And I went on to meet a handful of amazing people who are to this day, still my friends.

• I asked for help. Living in Los Angeles, prior to moving to Paris, I was very independent. I did what I wanted, when I wanted and didn’t need to rely on anybody. When I moved to Paris, I had to ask for help. Help opening my bank accounts and figuring out how to set up my monthly metro pass. Help finding my way because I left my Paris Pratique at home (cute little map book used before smart phones were common). Help moving my belongings across Pont de l’Alma at midnight (thanks Charlotte!) Paris humbled me…in a good way! And I am so appreciative for what I have and what I used to take for granted (toilet seat covers in Los Angeles… hmmm, actually, toilet seats!)

• I learned French. Ok, well at least I tried. I was studying at an English speaking university so I never became fluent unfortunately. Someday I will – it’s a huge goal of mine. I had the opportunity to take a six-week French immersion class my first summer in Paris – I highly recommend language immersion classes! I learned a lot. And even though I never became fluent, life did get easier the more and more French I picked up. Parlez-vous anglais?

• I got a Coach. My friends back home were all very supportive about my move, but they also could not understand the hardships I was experiencing. I was in Paris, shouldn’t life be an epic romantic cinematic adventure??!! Ha! I was introduced to an amazing woman who coached me through my struggles – I shared with her my bad times and good times in Paris. I laughed with her and cried. During our first session together I told her how miserable I was and how I wanted to move back home. After time, I fell back in love with Paris. And then eventually, I had to leave – my student visa expired and I couldn’t find a job. My coach and I laughed as I now cried because I couldn’t stay in Paris!

• I relaxed and I learned. In the beginning I was so stressed out and lonely and frustrated and this and that. After awhile, I learned to relax and enjoy my new life. This didn’t come naturally. I had to remind myself – take this all in – you never know how long this experience will last – learn from it, the good and the bad. Heck, I’m living in the number one tourist destination in the world I thought – I better start to appreciate it! And I did. Perhaps many glasses of vin rouge helped!

Now that I’m back in Los Angeles, I will be forever grateful for my two years in Paris – the good times and the bad. I learned just how resilient and tenacious I am. I wasn’t lost at all, I was just rediscovering myself on this new journey. I am humbled, stronger, more cultured and well traveled, and I have friends that I can always go visit in a city that I will always love…my home, Paris. Paris, tu me manques!

Hugs and love,

Katie

Happy New Year!

So, this is my first blog post ever! I love being a coach and I love my clients. I love people in general, and have always been good at sharing my words and thoughts verbally, but I have never considered myself a writer. I fear the idea of writing! Everybody keeps telling me, I gotta blog. So after some, ok, a lot of nudging from my friends and coaching colleagues, I am stepping way out of my comfort zone by slapping some tape over the mouth of my inner critic and not only putting my words in writing, but by also sharing these written words with you. My stomach hurts a little just by writing that last part.

I spent today finishing up some last minute tasks before I get ready to ring in the New Year this evening. I also spent today thinking a lot about this past year. I don’t know about you, but my past year was a doozey. Earlier this year, I quit my financially stable job at a private equity firm because the environment was toxic and the work was extremely unfulfilling, and began working at a global bank. The environment was much better but I once again took another financially stable job, which left me feeling completely unfulfilled and like I should be doing something more worthwhile with my time. To top that off I signed up for a very rigorous coaching certification program at the exact same time I started with the bank. And then I left the security of the bank job to focus on growing my coaching business, aka I entered the world of being an entrepreneur – holy cow! All of this while life was happening around me – good stuff, bad stuff, exciting stuff, hum drum everyday stuff, births, deaths, marriages, divorces…

When I look back at the major stuff, the stuff I took on by choice to create a more fulfilling life – quitting my job (twice), completing the coaching certification, becoming an entrepreneur, I automatically think about how hard it’s been; how scared I was quitting my job – how will I pay rent? Where will I find my self worth? What will others think of my decision? Am I freaking crazy?!?!? I started to feel very heavy and anxious and fearful of all of the unknowns, of the things I haven’t figured out yet. I had to stop myself. I don’t want to end my year stressed out! I decided I wanted to shift my thinking so I didn’t wake up and begin 2015 feeling anxious and fearful. I closed my eyes, took a deep breath and I started to think of what I can be grateful for in each situation.

• Quitting the private equity firm– I stepped into my power and took control over my life by leaving an unhealthy situation that was leaving me feeling sick and depressed every day.
• Completing the coaching certification program – I was reminded of my strength and my resilience of being able to complete a demanding program while transitioning into a new job in order to make myself a better coach.
• Leaving the bank to grow my coaching business – I saw my courage and how I’m honoring my values of growth and adventure and freedom and living a fulfilling life!

So my dear friends, while I don’t have all of the answers, I can tell you this – change, even if by choice, can be tough. But rather than be held back by doubt, fear and the unknown, let’s be driven by possibility, opportunity and discovery. We never know how amazing it can be if we don’t make the leap, do the work, tough it out through the difficult times to get to the good stuff – the juicy stuff – what it’s all about. I’m in the thick of it now. I took that leap into entrepreneurship and it sure as heck isn’t easy, but it IS rewarding. As they say, the best is yet to come!

Hugs and love,
Katie